Thursday, August 31, 2006

Last Post for 600 Miles

I leave tonight, oh yeah, I leave tonight! I'm so excited! My bags are packed, my Ipod Shuffle is charged and loaded with all my favorite camera is ready to go!

Hope all my fellow bloggers and friends have a great weekend! I will blog about my adventures next week sometime.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Busier than Usual

Sigh. The school preparation frenzy is done. The kids got on the bus today. Their school clothes, shoes, book bags, supplies, etc.: all purchased. I have to pat myself on the back for some creative budgeting on that one. Yesterday we hit a sale at our local Meijer that was phenomenal! K Swiss shoes on clearance, really nice looking shirts and shorts for $2 each, 10 pack of socks for $5, book bags $6 off, etc. Jess buys her own school clothes since she is gainfully employed and doesn't want to be restricted to the "mom budget" that I have in place. I did buy her socks and shoes and supplies, as well as one outfit. I told her in September once she's bored with her current school clothes, I'll give her some money to buy a few more outfits. She was pretty agreeable to that suggestion.

I was somewhat prepared despite last night's last minute rush. I had already bought their supplies over the summer when crayons were .10 a box or binders were .60 each or I found boxes of #2 pencils for .15 each. I would look around when I'd be out shopping and pick up whatever sale item was the hot deal of the week. One week Kmart had rulers for .05 each...the next week our Walmart had ruled paper for .10 a pack. Office Depot had 5 spiral notebooks for .50 a pack. I find nickel and diming the sales like that makes school supply purchases a lot more affordable. August is a time when I have to budget very carefully. Jess' birthday falling at the end of the month, along with school supplies, clothes and school fees can bog down my cash flow. But I always make it. Somehow.

I went to the kids' open houses. One district, but they're all in three separate schools. When I walked in to Jo's classroom, I recognized his teacher. I said, "Hey, I know you!" She said, "I know you, too!" Turns out, we worked at the same restaurant before I came to work at my office job. She says I was her trainer. I'm hoping I was really nice to her when I trained her. Otherwise, look out Jo...this could be a long year for you! ;) In some ways, I'm glad to see them back in school. In other ways, it makes life more hectic.

In regard to my sister-in-law, Kay, and her surgery yesterday:

It was not good news. The cancer has spread to her lymph nodes. They did a second surgery to try to remove the cancer under the arm pit, however, it seems to have spread beyond that region. They will let her know more Thursday pending the pathology report. They will need to do chemo and radiation, for sure. The cancer is more progressed than they originally told her. Prior to the surgery they told her it was stage 1. They now say stage 3. I'm not real savvy on what all of this means. I hope to have more information about all of this before I leave on my trip. If not, I'll post an update next Tuesday. In the interim, please continue praying. We are going to go see her tonight.

Other than that sad report, I am just looking forward to my trip. I have had people give me "scare tactic" talks about how bad it's going to be, how women shouldn't travel alone, how I had better watch my bags and how I shouldn't talk to people, blah, blah, blah.

Despite all of this, I'm not nervous at all about this trip. I plan on reading and listening to music, writing and napping. I already miss the kids, but I know that me being an independent woman is good for them in many ways. They see that Mom isn't afraid to branch out and be confident.

I have only taken three trips without my family during my 15 years of marriage. The first two were when Josh and Jess were little. My friend, Sheila, and I took a trip to a Christian music festival in Kentucky once in 1996 and then again in 1997. The last time I went on a trip without them was in 2005. I went to Detroit, Michigan with my friend and her sister. The Detroit trip was the first time I was ever away from Jo. This trip will be the first time I've ever traveled alone.

Do any of you have any bus stories? Have you ever traveled by bus on a long trip? What was your experience like? I'd love to hear your story!

Until then, have a super good evening.

Friday, August 25, 2006

Silver Linings

I bought this little book, liked it, gave a copy to my Aunt Marlene, then bought another for myself. It's a tiny book, but it's packed full of lovely thoughts and uplifting phrases. I thought I'd share this thought today:

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A Quick Sketch

Yesterday Jo asked Rob to draw him a picture. Rob protested and said that he hasn't drawn in years, and is rusty. Jo kept asking him, so finally he sat down for about five minutes and sketched this super hero figure for Jo.

Jo was impressed, and I was, too. Rob has only drawn two or three pictures since I've known him. One was of Godzilla and King Kong fighting, which I was totally impressed by.

Rob doesn't think his sketches are good, but he is tickled that Jo and I like them. So, I thought I'd share this quick sketch with Bloggerville. :)

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Ellie: Isn't This Just What We Were Talking About?

A fellow blogger, Ellie, and I were talking recently about how she and I both think dogs that have to wear these cones based on vet's orders look like "lampshade" dogs. Her bird, Gypsy, recently suffered through wearing one for some time. My two dogs, Taz and Carlito, had to wear them after they were nuetered. I thought this cartoon was very appropriate based on those circumstances....

If a Picture's Worth 1,000 Words....

I am late in getting around to posting today; it's been hectic in general in my life. First of all, I want to say that we got the news today that my sister-in-law, Kay, does have breast cancer. However, right now they are saying the outlook seems pretty optimistic.

They will remove the breast on Monday, but they feel that since everything was caught early, she should not need chemo. She is a very little woman at age 42. In fact, she looks like a teenager from a distance. She's about 4'10 and 85 pounds. I think they'd like to avoid chemo if possible with her.

She's pretty nervous about everything, so again, prayers and positive thoughts, please, all!

No word yet on my brother-in-law's condition.

I have been taking pictures lately. Seems theraputic to me these days. I haven't really felt like writing poetry. I've really smiled a lot at some of my extra cute subjects. I would like to share some of my photos with you today. So, here they are:

The first two are my Tazzy relaxing on his bean bag chair:

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We've had him a year this month! He's such a blessing to us!

The next two are of our neighbor's kitten, Freckles. She is so adorable and ornery! I had to get a picture or two of her while she is still a little girl:

Here's another Freckles portrait:

Finally, while I was taking a picture of Freckles, a hummingbird flew up and decided to hang out at the flower box. It was kind enough to let me take some great pictures:

So, that's it for my picture parade for now.

On a good note, I have decided to take a bus to Atlanta to see my Uncle Ron. I've mentioned him rather frequently in the past. He's my favorite uncle. He is to me as Aunt Marlene is to my Mom's side of the family. We just have so much fun when we hang out.

Anyway, I'll be gone Labor Day weekend. I'm hopping the bus on Thursday night. I won't get into Atlanta until 1:00ish on Friday afternoon, and I will leave Sunday afternoon to be home Labor Day by 7 in the morning. This will be my first interstate bus trip. When I was 18, Rob and I lived in Columbia, SC, for several months. We used to take the bus throughout the city to the malls and shopping venues. We became quite adept at knowing where we needed to be and when. However, all of my traveling from state to state has been by car.

We were talking yesterday about me perhaps driving down by myself. The kids will be in school and Rob will have to work the shop over the weekend. So, we were discussing how I could get down there...just myself. Flying was talked about, but driving was something neither of us were real comfortable with, since there is so much wear and tear on vehicles involved. When I got online and researched it, a round trip airfare wasn't really something I could budget in.

I started thinking about what I could do, and then I started staring at the Yahoo front page, which is my home page. The headline read, "Students Combat Gas Prices By Utilizing Bus Systems," or something like that. Not thinking, I read it out loud. I hadn't even considered it as an option for going to Georgia. Rob, who was sitting nearby, said, "That's a great idea! You could take a bus!" The idea just kinda fell into our laps.

Uncle Ron and I have been saying that when God's timing is right, the door will be opened for me to come down. I've tried numerous times to go see him, but stuff kept coming up. From Hurricane Katrina, to school events, it seemed like I was never going to make it back down. We'd visited on Labor Day weekend of 2004, all five of us. Then Uncle Ron was in for four days in January 2005 for Grandma's funeral. Since then, it's just been one failed plan after another. But I do believe that God's timing is better than ours.

Uncle Ron's been battling poor health, so what I want more than anything is to just be able to give him a big hug and spend some time with he and my Aunt Pat. They're such sweet people, and getting away from Ohio right now seems like a welcome break.

Other than that trip, there isn't a whole lot of exciting going on. Today I did bring Jo-Jo to work with me. I do that once or twice a month. He's very sweet and doesn't give me any trouble at all while he's here. I enjoy having him with me. My boss doesn't care as long as I don't make it a daily event.

We have a conference room in the back that we don't use very often. It's equipped with a t.v., vcr, dvd player, desk, couch, chairs, etc. He sits back there and colors, snacks, watches t.v, plays toys, and reads. Today I took a lunch break and took him to the library. They had a lot of used books for sale, many of them kids books. They were selling hard cover books for .25 and softcover for .10. We got those, checked out some "Learn Spanish" VHS and cassette tapes, and Jo checked out two books as well. We stopped by Rob's job on his lunch break, then finished off the hour by grabbing a bite to eat. It was refreshing to take a lunch break, since I seldom do.

So, that's about all that is noteworthy at this time. My post has now become a novel, but it will make up for my lack of posts on Thursday and Monday on the weekend I leave. :)

Hope you are having a great day where you are! Thanks for stopping by!

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Ha Ha Hilarious

My sick sense of humor strikes again...but this one was a knee slapper for me:

This One's For Holli:

Happy Anniversary to You, Happy Anniversary to You, Happy Anniversary, Holli! Happy Anniversary to You! ;) Here's a little prayer to help you on your lifelong journey with your hubby........ :) Seriously, though, have a great day and celebrate! Love is a good reason to party! :)

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

The 4-1-1 is D.O.A.

So I went up to the animal contol office to find out who issued the report. When I talked to the officer over the phone last week, I indicated that I would be obtaining a copy of the report, as I wanted to find out who made such ridiculous claims. He purposely left the name and address of the caller blank so I wouldn't know who made the call. The head of the department, who I talked to for about a half an hour, also knew who it was and wouldn't tell me.

So, I am basically left with a plateful of distrust for my neighbors and a whole heck of a lot of frustration. I'm going to have to get over this. Right now I am purposely trying to let it go. If I don't, it will eat me up inside.

I know what kind of person I am, and I'm trying to remind myself that, indeed, that is all that truly matters in this situation.

Cute Little Video Clip

Oh man, this is cute!

Auto pilot...Engage!

Has life ever gotten so weird that you kind of auto pilot and coast? I feel like I'm doing that this week.

We had a really weird experience Sunday.

I stayed home and cleaned the better part of the day. At the end of the afternoon, I realized I needed several cleaning supplies/grocery-type items.

I started to call Rob at the shop and give him a list. I knew he was going to the store, anyway, and wouldn't mind picking up some extra stuff. Then I changed my mind, and opted to head up to the shop. I hadn't seen him all day, and it would give me a welcome break from the housework.

On the way there, I traveled the usual country roads, then merged on to the four lane highway that leads to the shop. I had Jo, Josh and John with me. John is Josh's friend...and Jess' boyfriend.

Right away I noticed that the highway was super busy for that time of day on a late Sunday afternoon. I got behind a semi going about 55 to 60. I wanted to go around, because the speed limit was 65, but there was so much traffic, I had to wait it out. So, I've traveled about a mile, and I look into my rearview mirror. At first I thought I was seeing things.

In the rearview, I can see a woman swerving all over the road. At first I thought she was impatient and trying to pass me. I thought maybe she couldn't see the cars to the left on her in the fast lane. I assumed they were in her blind spot. I just wasn't sure what to make of it.

Then I realized she was out of control. She swerved repeatedly into the left lane, while the cars swerved to avoid her. Some of them had to go off into the shoulder to get around her. At this point, I'm on high alert, not sure what I could do. I couldn't pass the semi in front of me. I didn't want to slow down and have her rear end me, but I didn't want to get too close to the semi, in case she DID rear end me and push us forward into the rig.

The kids are turning around, trying to keep an eye on her. Josh said she looked like she was falling asleep at the wheel. Trying to keep one eye on the road and one eye in my rear view mirror was tricky. Plus I was trying to keep the kids calm and remain calm myself. Every few minutes, she'd drive up on my bumper and then pull back and swerve.

Not 1/4 of a mile from our exit, I looked back, and her car careened off the road to the right and down this VERY steep enbankment. What amazed me about the whole thing, is she didn't flip the car at all. Her car came to a stop without a scratch. Josh says he saw a little kid peek its head up from the back seat after she stopped.

I got on my cel phone and called 9-1-1. I couldn't stop suddenly to see if she needed help. I couldn't even get off the exit and go back to make sure she was okay, because there was no way of crossing the highway to get to that side without traveling 4-5 miles down the road.

So, when I called 9-1-1, they said "Ma'am, we can't stay on the phone with you. We're aware of the situation, we're getting more calls about it than we can handle right now."

Wheh! That was scary. Truly. I'm praying that she and the child are both okay. That was more excitement than I bargained for that afternoon.

Continuing with dramatic events, my mother-in-law called last night and said that they had to fly her son (my brother-in-law) to Japan for medical intervention. He's in the officer in the Navy. He's stationed somewhere overseas unbeknownst to us. It's all a hush-hush mission type thing. Anyway, they found two growths under the skin of his chest, and the closest hospital that has facilities for testing is in Japan. We're supposed to know more about what's going on this week. His name is Fred, and we'd appreciate prayers on this one.

Additionally, my sister-in-law, Kay, has had a history of cysts in her breasts. She gets them every couple of years. This time, they decided to remove the growths for testing. She had them removed yesterday. The doctors are supposed to have the results by tomorrow on whether or not they are the same benign growths she normally gets or if they are cancerous. Again, prayers are appreciated.

That's about it. I think that's enough, don't you? Geez!

School starts next week, and I haven't done much preparation to speak of. I do have most of the school supplies, and four shirts for Jo, but that's it. There's shoe shopping and clothes shopping and bookbag shopping to be done for all three. Plus, Jess' fourteenth birthday is coming up that week. Ugh! Talk about no breathing room!

Okay, that's it for now. I've got to find something lighthearted to post later in the day. Otherwise, I might get a reputation as a cranky blogger. ;)

On a positive note, the weather here is moderate, sunny, and fantastic! How's the weather your way?

Have a great day!

Monday, August 21, 2006

Tale from the Crypt...

I worked on this post off and on all day yesterday. I never got it finished. I just wasn't in the "writing mode" then. Hopefully it will be finished by today (Tuesday) and posted:

I just finished having lunch. A plate full of fresh spinach, sunflower seeds sprinkled over, some cut up chicken breast with Ranch dressing. Yum! That was a nice change.

Now on to the reason for the title of my blog post:

Friday after I posted I got a call from my daughter. I was so angry at the time of the call, I didn't post for the rest of the day, nor did I trust myself to. To say I was angry would have been the understatement of the year. My cheese was grated. My beets were pickled. I was mad.

The thing was, I started the day out in a great mood. Thursday had been a tough day, and I was having a Happy Friday. Until the call.

So, Jess calls me. She says, "Mom, Animal Control has been sitting in front of the house in the driveway for like a half an hour now." The first thing I thought of was that the dogs must have been barking. We live in a really small town, a village, actually, and practically everyone in the town has a dog...or two or three. We've never had any trouble with our dogs being barkers, so I was at a loss. I asked Jess, and she said the dogs started barking after the guy pulled up, but not until then. Taz was outside running around with the two big dogs, having a good time. The kids are home in the summer during the time we are at work, so the dogs were not alone.

So I asked Jess to hand the phone to the animal control officer. He had not entered the gate, because it is clearly posted, "No Trespassing" and "Beware of Dog." I had been told by several dog owners that it would be a good idea...even if your dogs seem friendly to post this type of warning at both gates. It's some sort of Ohio liability issue. So, anyway, he got on the phone and I identified myself and said, "What's going on?"

Immediately he laughed, and said, "Okay, it's okay. We did get a complaint called in that your dogs are neglected."

Right then and there I exploded, "WHAT?!"" I think I yelled it in the poor man's ear.

I stammered and started to protest, when he interrupted me. "Ma'am, I just want to say that I'm already writing this up as a 'unsubstantiated complaint,' but I did have to investigate." He went on to say that from outside the fence he could see food and water and shelter were indeed provided for the dogs. He noted that their coats were glossy and they were not running loose. He said when he pulled up the kids were in the yard, playing with them. He said that one of the dogs could be considered obese (Carlito), and the little one (Taz) was chubby. He noted that Gideon seemed to be a healthy body weight. None of them seemed injured and all seemed to be thriving.

I explained to him that all the dogs were up to date on their shots, had all been neutered recently, had prescriptions for both flea and worm prevention. He explained that by state law, they were not authorized to enforce those items, but that he would make note of it. I offered to provide veterinary records on all three dogs. He assured me that it would not be necessary. I then asked if I would be able to find out who made this ludicrous claim. He said that as of Tuesday I could come in with an i.d. and obtain a copy of the complaint.

Let me explain something about our yard. The way our acre is situated, only one part of our yard is openly visible. It is fenced in all the way around the entire acre. The fence is a tall chain link fence. On one side and in the back yard, there are pine trees all along the fenceline. They create a barrier, making it impossible to see in.

There is, consequently, only one or two neighbors of ours that can see into our yard from their yards. One of the neighbors is unemployed, and her spouse, twenty plus years her senior, is retired. Years ago, this "lady" argued with my grandfather and I intervened. Grandpa was using a leaf blower to get fallen leaves away from the fenceline and in to the street so he could bag them. The neighbor went and got a really long extension chord and stood in the street with her leaf blower, blowing the leaves back against the fence.

At that point I told Grandpa to go in the house, and I would handle it. At that time, I was 21 or 22, but Grandpa was very frail and sickly. He was in his late 70s, and not in good health.

I walked over to where she was, and asked her if she had anything better to do than pick on a defenseless elderly gentleman. She started ranting about how if those leaves started blowing over to her yard, she'd have to bag them up and she didn't have f------ time for it. She was swearing and making herself look like and idiot. Realizing that I wasn't going to get anywhere talking to her, I walked to my car, got in, and started it up. I intended to drive off and leave her ranting in the street. However, she followed me to the car, stood right at my drivers' side window, continuing to spew profanities. She ended her rant by telling me, "Go home, n----r lover."

I don't have a whole lot of patience for ignorance of this magnitude. The cursing I could have ignored, but she crossed a line in my mind with that comment. At this point in the conversation, I reminded her that I was behind the wheel of a car, that the car was running, and that it would be quite easy for my foot to accidentally slip off the brake and on to the gas. It would be a shame, I said, because she was standing right in front of my car. I encouraged her that the safest thing to do was to take her ignorant self home where she would be much safer. So, seeing the wisdom of my words, she went home. Over the last 12+ years, that was the very last run in we've ever had. I figured she'd be pretty upset when I bought the house and moved in, but she has actually waved on a regular basis and seemed friendly since. I guess she figured "if you can't beat them, join them."

I thought we were all on good terms. Up until now. I don't know yet if it was her that made this call. The neighbor across the street seems to think it was perpetuated by a completely different source.

A couple of months back, Jo, Josh and several neighborhood kids were playing basketball on a street hoop located off the road west of our house. It isn't unusual for 8-10 kids to play football, basketball, soccer, or whatever game they think up in our yard or in other parent's yards on the block.

About six houses down, a man had a pit bull and a pregnant Rotweiler. He had a kennel for them, which they didn't use much, and an invisible fence. They had trouble with the invisible fence, and the dogs would get out on a frequent basis. The dogs were very aggressive. They would chase passersby, although they had never bitten anyone that I'm aware of. The scariest part of walking past the house was never knowing when the dogs ran toward you if the fence was up and running or not.

Anyway, the boys were playing, and there were several neighborhood parents watching. All of a sudden, the female Rotweiler from down the street ran out of its yard, into the street toward Jo and started growling and chasing him. The parents got Jo and the other kids to safety and called Animal Control.

Since this was like the fifth or sixth call on the dogs, and the owner had several previous citations for vicious dogs, the dogs were removed from the owner's possession. I guess he never got the dogs back. From what I now understand, he believed that we called Animal Control. That would be logical, because we were the parents of the boy that his dog chased. However, I didn't know anything about the incident until the boys told me about it later that evening.

I still don't know who made the call. Right now I've just been guessing and tossing around theories. I guess one could say that the situation ended well, because we were found to be in the right. However, now I feel like my trust in my neighborhood has been shattered. I can't figure out why people would be so vindictive. What's going to be next? Will they always target us and our dogs for this type of pettiness?

That's my rant about that. I had to get it out of my system. Today I'll go and get a copy of the paperwork, and at least have some closure on the "who." I wish all people were good and decent. I really do.

That's my Tale from the Crypt. I'll blog more later on unrelated topics.

Hope you're having a decent day, and that you have no drama to speak of in your life today, unless it's winning the lottery.

Saturday, August 19, 2006

Simple Song of Praise...and Gratitude

I am grateful, grateful, grateful to God for the news that Aunt Marlene does not have melanoma. It is basal cell (sp?) and she will recover from it. I am bubbling over with joy and gratitude. She will have surgery in October, and she will need to have some reconstructive surgery afterward. However, I am not going to lose her from this, and I will not have to watch her suffer and die from this cancer. I watched a close friend, Toni, suffer and die in 1995 from bone cancer, and I watched my grandmother suffer from a myriad of illnesses and finally die. I didn't have the strength...I didn't have the go through this type of pain again so soon. I give glory to God...for sparing me this...I give thanks to my friends for their prayers, healing thoughts, and energy.

This song echos through my heart:

God is so good;
God is so good-
God is so good,
He's so good to me.

I broke my "blogger-free weekend streak" to tell you this news. I am blessed, blessed, blessed, blessed, blessed. Did I mention blessed?

Life is hard. I've lost so many I love. I've been down a lot of roads I didn't want to travel. I've never had anything handed to me. I've always had to struggle for anything I have. At this point in my life, I'm not overly certain of much. I do know this: I still believe. I don't have a lot of answers, but the God of my childhood...that I talked to before anyone ever told me there was one...the God that protected me all those many years ago from neglect and abandonment and rejection...He still hears me and hears the voices that cry out to Him, weak or strong. And I am grateful. So very grateful.

Did I mention grateful? :)

Hope you're having a good weekend as well. Love and peace to you all.

Laugh out Loud and Relate!

Holli, I know you can't watch these videos, but I think Tracy already sent this to you. It's the David Letterman salutes Bill Gates one, fyi. :)

To all my other peeps, I hope you get a chuckle out of this one. I think we have all been here! :)

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Friday, August 18, 2006

Is it Any Wonder I Love This Woman So Much?

Today I found a card from my Aunt Marlene that she wrote to me just a few weeks after Mom passed away. This was her fraternal twin sister that she lost. Yet she sent ME a card, comforting me. I had to share it with you. It continues to touch my heart every time I read it. Is it any wonder I love this woman so much and feel so close to her? She and I have the kind of relationship that Mom and I could never have. I feel the same way about my Uncle Ron from Georgia. He is the dad I don't have in his brother. I continually ask him if he wants to adopt me, and he says, "Sure! I have four girls already, and you're like one of my own, so what the heck?" :)

I have a card album I periodically add cards to. I save cards that are especially meaningful to me...or especially funny. I will have to start a second album soon, but one thing I am sure of: this one is a keeper!

Aunt Marlene is also on my mind today because she goes to consult with her doctor regarding this surgery. At first I thought today was the ACTUAL surgery, but turns out, I misunderstood. Today is an "explore our options" appointment. We all hope to be better informed afterward.

Anyway, here is the card I wanted to share:

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Yesterday was a tough day for me, but today seems to be turning out much better. Sheila stopped by work after hours yesterday and we had a really good talk. I always love spending time with her. Then I went home and cleaned like a mad woman. Rob and I were hacked off at each other, so both of us stayed away from one another in the house. Jess and Jo were at a friend's house, and Josh was playing basketball across the street with a friend.

I usually don't spend that much time after work cleaning. I think I cleaned for a solid three hours. I put all my angry energy to work, and I am happy with the results. I guess we need to have a good spat on occasion. :) Makes the house look much more tidy! That, and I slept good having worn myself out. The scales say I lost two pounds today, so that's good. I'm not a huge fan of housework, but my waistline seems to approve.

Hope you all have a great weekend. Anything exciting in store?

Thursday, August 17, 2006

The Perfect Man?

Anyone else think this guy sounds appealing? He wouldn't argue, make messes, play mind games, or be moody. :) More of my Dilbert favorites...

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I was sitting here and had a realization. Sometimes my job helps me keep my sanity in tact.

I've always thought I hated math and numbers. Math was my least favorite subject in school.

However, a lot of what I do in my day to day job deals with inputting numbers, using calculations, verifying tabulations, etc.

Today has been a particularly stressful day for me. I've been letting worries bombard me. I've got stuff filed in the back of my mind that is trying to push its way to the forefront of my thinking.

So, this morning I threw myself in to my work. I have been efficient all morning. It has been rather busy around here.

Then in occurred to me that my job...the hands on stuff...has helped me stay calm despite my anxiety. It's the very numbers I could never appreciate that are helping me keep my ducks in a row. I think it's partially about being able to do this job without putting much thought into it. I could probably do it in my sleep....maybe even blindfolded. I think there is some comfort in that.

So I'm thankful for that today.

What's good in your life?

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

This One Made Me Think of Neicy

One for Ellie, Two for Me....

A couple of chuckles for the day: ....Ellie, do you ever feel like this? I know I do! ;)
This was actually a card that one of my friends sent me some time ago. Sooo funny!

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Here's a Dilbert from my "favorites" archives. I have to laugh but this one really hits close to home. ;)

Halfway to the Weekend!

Today I don't feel like taking a trip down memory lane. Sometimes rehashing those feelings can be emotionally draining. Today, I'm keeping it lighthearted. Hopefully. :)

I tell you, today is one of those beautiful days that really makes fall seem just a breathe away. The sun is shining, the humidity is low and it's comfortable...maybe low 70s. Ooh! I love this kind of weather!

I've got some work to get to, but I will check back later today.

Hope you're having a great day so far!

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Glimpses into the Past

"It got back to us what you're doing. Think! Think, Kristi. Think about what you're doing! What kind of future are you going to have?!? No one is going to accept you! Neither side! What kind of future will your children have??!"

"I see we can't change your mind on this. Very well. Make your choice. You're seventeen years old. You've just graduated. You've got your whole life ahead of you. If this is what you want, fine. Make your choice now. Either stop seeing him, or pack your stuff and leave today."

That very day I packed my bags and moved on. I don't regret it.

Monday, August 14, 2006

All For One and One For All...A Family Portrait

Because love shouldn't be put in a box;
because assumption is never wise,
because this family is about our hearts...
in order to see the truth you must be blind.

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The Monday Blahs

Right now I could sing "Rainy Days and Mondays." Really. I could. I am an alto with no vocal range whatsoever. There are a couple of singers out there that I love to sing their music. Why? Because their music doesn't pose any sort of vocal challenge to me. Karen Carpenter is one. I can sound very much like her. Bipsy hates Karen Carpenter music and she HATES it when I sing her songs. She says the Carpenters' music all sounds the same. Okay...Peter, Paul and Mary. I can sing their songs. Especially "Leavin' on a Jet Plane." Oh boy, can I sing that one. And anything by Amy Grant. No challenge there. Of course, I really haven't listened to her music since the late 80's. I'd love to be able to sing all over the scales, but I know my limitations. So, today I'm sticking to my own and singing "Rainy Days and Mondays" under my breath.

I love music...lots of types of music. Country and rap don't rank among my top favorites, but even among them I have songs I love. I use music to influence my moods. I love to put on dance music if I need to workout. Just helps me get the right mind set.

Right now I've got Mike's Ipod...Mike is my friend, Deb's, oldest son. He got this Ipod from of the older versions but with lots of song space. It has this huge variety of music on it. However, it's acting like it isn't fully charged. Keeps giving me errors. Windows isn't recognizing it. Bummer. I wanted to put some of my song library on his Ipod and visa/versa. Oh well. The best laid plans, ya know?

This weekend was pretty much uneventful. I had to guzzle Benadryl like a fiend over the weekend because of my allergies. I had no choice because my face was red and my eyes were watering, etc., etc. Nothing I took was working. People thought I was crying. Deb and I found some children's Benadryl liquid, and I found out that it seems to work faster than the pill form. So instead of driving home from the shop on Saturday after Rob got there, I went out in the car and fell asleep sitting up. I swear, people must have thought I was drunk. ;) What a sight I must have been. Nothing quite so attractive as a spotchy faced 30- something woman drooling on herself in the front seat of her car. Oh well. There's talk that I may not win the "Stylin' Mom of the Year Award" now. ;)

Yet the mega-dose of antihistimines seemed to do the trick and yesterday I was able to mow the yard, clean and dust and all that jazz that I'm not supposed to do. Why avoid an allergen when you can simply o.d. on drugs and get rid of it? Sounds logical to me. ;)

Today I'm kind of drowsy and my back hurts big time. I think it was the mowing. It's not something I do every day. The grass was kind of high behind our barn/shed, and I had to do a whole lot of pulling and pushing the mower. I think that's what caused the back pain.

I did color my hair this weekend. The last few times I colored my's been awhile...I went auburn. My natural hair color is reddish/brownish, but the sun adds blonde streaks, and I have a few grays creeping in. This time I decided to opt for uniformity, so I went light brown. It turned out kind of lighter than I expected on the ends, but looks natural. I'm glad I decided to make the change. Jess likes it, and that's a good sign. She's not going to lie to me, that's for sure. If she hates something I'm wearing or doesn't like a hairstyle I've tried, she's quick to let me know.

Jess bought me some cute little rooster knick knacks for my kitchen. Then Deb gave me two rooster wall decorations that were really cute. Getting unexpected stuff like that is nice. Jess said she felt sorry for me Saturday because I was feeling crummy, and she wanted to cheer me up. So sweet.

Sunday, Jo and I started staining my shelf, but the first coat looked like a couple of two year olds did it. Mostly it was my fault. I swear, I just don't think I was feeling the "stain a shelf" vibe. I also felt lazy and didn't wear gloves. I think I ended up with more stain on my hands and arms than on the shelf. I finally gave up and let it dry for the rest of the day. Hopefully the second coat won't look quite as ridiculous. There's always the option of starting all over, I guess. I'm sure I'll get that done in my imaginary spare time.

So, today I've just been taking things moment by moment. I've drank a few extra cups of coffee and have just kept plodding away. I did talk to Aunt Marlene today, and she seems to be in a pretty good spirits. Her surgery is Friday, so I'm sure we're all ready to have some idea of what her treatment plan is going to be. Thanks to all of you who have offered kind words, prayers and a listening ear. You're awesome!

That's all I have to say for now. More later.

The Jim Brueur "Hokey Pokey" Video

Jim Breuer - AcDc

A video that ALWAYS makes me laugh. Hope you get a chuckle, too. It's kinda long, but seriously funny.

Friday, August 11, 2006

Need a Laugh? I Know I Do!

How can you be sad when you see this? Really, they are just too cute!

Thursday, August 10, 2006

A Photo Flashback to Happier Days

Mom (L) and Aunt Marlene (R) in days gone by....

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Aunt Marlene

Just a quick post regarding Aunt Marlene.

I left work yesterday to spend the afternoon with her. What I learned was that it was two moles that she had removed, one of them had appeared last year. Both are cancerous. They will have to go in and cut tissue from her nose until they reach non-cancerous cells. From there, we will know more. It sounds like tests will need to be done to make sure the cancer hasn't spread. Then her treatment options will be made known to her.

We had a really good visit yesterday. Unbeknownst to me, she is on the internet. She has a computer and high speed internet now. I showed her how to get on my blogs and read them. From now on, I'll be posting in a little larger font, because you know, when people get old, they can't see as well. HAHA! Just kidding, Aunt Marlene. ;) One of the great things about spending time with Aunt Marlene is that we make each other laugh so much. We both need that.

I was touched because I heard Aunt Marlene talking to my brother, T., and I heard him talking about someone being good to have around. That this person was "inspirational" and a person who brings positivity and laughter with them. That this person is someone you want around if you want to feel better. It turns out, he was talking about me! I thought it was sweet. I didn't know he felt that way about me. Snif. Of course, then I asked him if I was so inspirational, why doesn't he come and see me more often? I had to get that barb in somehow. ;)

Anyway, your continued positive thoughts and prayers are greatly appreciated. I'm really tired today, feeling pretty emotionally drained.

I feel strongly that Aunt Marlene is going to do well. She thought is was no coincidence that the day before yesterday (Tuesday) I was feeling "weepy" all day. That was the day she got her news about the cancer. She said she cried off and on throughout the day. Was it her pain I was feeling or my friend's? Or both? I don't know.

Today I'm supposed to go to Sandy's for a crop. I may stay just a few hours. Sandy's street intersects with Aunt Marlene's. There is an hour between the time I get off work and the time I have to be at the crop. I may just spend that hour visiting with my favorite aunt. ;)

On another note, today is my 8th anniversary here at work. Woo-hoo. Bipsy and I may have lunch together...not sure which.

Also, if my Jess reads this, which if she doesn't, maybe Deb will and then maybe Deb will tell Jess what I said (hint hint) :) ...anyway, I'm so thankful for Jess right now. She has spent the last few days cleaning. The kitchen is sparkling and has been when I arrive home two days in a row. The dishes have been washed and dried and put away. The counters are organized and tidy, and even my white floor has been a white floor for the last two days. I've been so impressed. I've told her so in person, but I felt her efforts have been worthy of a mention on my blog. She's a blessing.

So, that's it for now. I hope you're having a great day there. More later.

Wednesday, August 9, 2006


My brother just called me. My Aunt Marlene has been diagnosed with skin cancer. She has had a mole on her nose for several years, and they just removed it. It is cancerous. We don't know how bad it is. She lives just a mile from my workplace, so I am leaving to go see her. My birth mom was her twin sister. Mom survived Non-Hogkins Lymphoma, only to die of a blood clot last November.

My Aunt Marlene and I are very close. Her best friend, Chris, committed suicide on Mother's Day weekend. Last year in June her daughter-in-law died in a car accident. July 9th, her grandson had heart surgery. She has just had so much to contend with. My heart is breaking right now. Please, please, please pray for her.

Thank you.

Sadness and Insight

Well, I am happy to report that I am feeling better today. It's strange. I have this thing that happens every now and then.

It goes something like this: I get blue, feel inexplicably sad, then I get a phone call or an email or visit from a friend who is down or depressed and needs an ear. Then it dawns on me that maybe I was feeling...without actually realizing it...the pain of my friend. Because this happened yesterday, and as soon as I talked to this friend, and once she was feeling better, I perked up.

I could go on and on about this...I could fill post after post about it...incidents that have happened in the past, dreams I've had, etc., but I'm not all that comfortable with the subject. I can't explain it, and I try not to dwell on it. Just to kind of half heartedly explain what I mean, I will give you an example:

These "feelings" can scare me, especially one time about 11 years ago. All day I had a feeling of dread. It was overwhelming. Almost to the point where I was sick to my stomach. Like pending doom. I kept praying and pacing the floor, nearly in torment. I kept telling Rob about it, and he didn't know what to think.

The day went along, and nothing unusual happened. I went to bed, still restless, and finally slept. About 2 a.m., we got a call that there had been a fire, and Rob's cousin had been killed. She was fifteen years old. We had just seen her the day before she died. In fact, for years, we lived on the same street.

What happened is this: she woke up, got her mom and dad and sisters up, got them out, and then got trapped by a beam and couldn't get out herself. The firefighters heard her screaming and couldn't get to her. The house burned to the ground. The whole family was devastated for the longest time. The community rallied together, and was indeed a blessing to the family. In fact, at the funeral, there was a line snaked around the church of her friends, fellow students and coworkers, all waiting to pay their respects.

What I will never understand is what good was my "feeling" if she still died? I may never know the answer to that. It will remain a mystery to me until the next life, I suppose.

The feeling I had that day is just one example out of the many times that these incidents have happened. The same thing happened the night before my birth mother passed away. Instead of dread, it was an overwhelming feeling of loneliness. Likewise, for months before my grandparents each passed, I sensed the loss coming. I talked about it over and over to Rob, who kept trying to dismiss my feelings in order to comfort me. When grandma went into the nursing home, I kept saying, "I just feel like she's not coming home." She never did.

These events are unsettling to me. Although, I have had them be positive as well.

A friend of mine had a daughter who was told by her doctor that she wouldn't be able to have children. She had been married for quite some time, and their attempts to have children had failed. Right after learning about this sad news, I had a dream to the contrary.

I dreamed she was holding a little girl, her granddaughter. Just a few months later, this friend's daughter became pregnant. Without medical intervention. Months later, they found out via the sonogram that the baby was a boy.

My friend asked me, "What's with that? Your dream said it was a girl." I replied, "Who said the dream was foreseeing THIS pregnancy?" My friend smiled.

"They say they aren't going to have any other kids. They only want one." I said, "All I know is what I saw in the dream."

My friend's daughter had a healthy baby boy. Less than two years later, he was joined by a beautiful little sister. I think I resisted saying, "I told you so!" :) Both children have been a joy to my friend and their parents.

Anyway, what I really found interesting is reading my grandmother's side of the family's newsletter. It is sent out by our family historian, who has done extensive research over the years regarding our ancestry. Apparently, during the Salem Witch Hunt, two of our female relatives were burned at the stake for being witches due to having "the sight," or "unnatural insight." Several of the women on that side of the family have this tendency. Coincidence? I don't know. I just know what I feel, but I don't always know why. Perhaps it's a gift. Again, I'm not always sure it's one I am glad to have. It's just there.

Hope you all are having a great day today. More later.

Tuesday, August 8, 2006

Cute Little Bear

I am still kinda blue, but this news story made me smile. This is so cute! Almost cute in an ugly way, but cute. ;)

Bordering on Weepy

I have absolutely nothing to complain about today, but for some reason I am feeling a tad bit down. Almost weepy.

I had a good evening last night. I went to Bipsy's...just she and I..and we worked some more on our borders. We got a lot accomplished. We took a break to enjoy the hot tub, then I packed up and headed home. She's had some extra time on her hands because her guy is out of town for the week, so we've been hanging out a lot more often.

So, that's what's weird about this whole thing. I enjoy spending time there, I feel great about getting to do something I enjoy twice in less than a week.

Moreover, Josh started football today, and I am so happy he's getting involved with something he enjoys. I think it's going to help him stay motivated in school. We had a great mom/son chat on the way to practice today. He needed a physical yesterday, and everything worked out so well that I didn't even have to leave work to take him. My friend, Deb, brought him to me at work, and Rob took him to the appointment. Everything fell in to place without a hitch.

I've lost 13 pounds, I'm feeling healthier, I'm finally making my own health a priority. I'm trying to count my blessings, but I just feel like something isn't right.

So what's the dealio?

I don't know. Can't put my finger on it. I'm just feeling sad.

This, too, shall pass. Until then, I have a pretty busy day ahead of me, so I may be blogger absent for the rest of the day. Hope to be back on track tomorrow. In the interim, I'm going to put on some music and try to pull myself out of the duldrums I feel myself sinking into.

Have a great day, and thanks for checking in!

Monday, August 7, 2006

One of Rob's Favorite Songs

This is one of those songs that Rob liked so much that it became one of my favorites, too. Every time I hear it I think of he and I, riding with the windows down, singing to it at the top of our lungs.

Music Video Codes by

Another Monday Came Knocking

Here it is again. Monday. If you're an optimist, it could be the fresh start you need. The dawn of a new era. The beginning of something wonderful. You might be shouting, "This is the day that the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it!"

If you're neither here nor there, it could be just another Monday. The start of yet another week. Yet another day. Nothing to see here.

Or, if you are a pessimist or just have really low seratonin levels ;) it could be the start of a nightmarish week, seemingly without end. It could be all you can do to put one foot in front of the other. You might wish Monday would go away, opting to hide out under the covers and wait it out.

I've had Mondays that mirrored all of the above. I think today I'm more the middle ground. Not overly joyful yet certainly not down and out.

How about you? Where are you in your heart as we start a new week?

How was your weekend? Anything new to report?

As for me, my weekend was good. In fact, the good started out Friday. I took a long lunch to hang out with Sheila and our long time friend, Betsy. I hadn't seen Betsy in years, and the visit, albiet short, was delightful. We laughed and chatted just like we'd seen one another only weeks earlier. Besty was in my wedding many years back. She was amazed to hear that Josh, my oldest, will be a sophomore this year. I think she was in shock that time passed that fast. I know it continues to baffle me. I met Betsy's kids for the first time. Up until now, I'd only seen them in pictures. We decided to get together a lot more often in the future.

Friday evening, I went to Bipsy's for a crop. Sandy and Beth went as well. Sheila was supposed to go, but she ended up not being able to attend.

Despite that disappointment, the four of us who did make it had a great time. We worked on decorative items/borders for our books. I suggested since we were all working on borders, it might be fun if we shared the task. For example, if I made a rose border, I would make four of them...three of them to share. If Sandy was making an item with hearts, she would make four, and share. It went a lot faster that way. We each worked with a couple of different tools or punches, and the whole process worked like an assembly line. Only a whole lot funner and sillier.

We had really good food, which included fresh strawberries, homemade spinach dip, pita chips, hamburgers on the grill, and all kinds of other goodies.

One of the funnest parts of the evening was taking a break and getting in the hot tub. We looked a sight, I'm sure. With the jets on, it's hard to keep from floating. Sandy slipped getting in, and we thought she was going to drown for a second. She sputtered and then righted herself, and then began giggling hysterically. I think the neighbors probably thought we were having a drunken party as much as we were cracking up.

We ended up cropping until about 1:30 p.m., so Beth and I ended up spending the night. I was up and out early...around 7:30 a.m., but enjoyed a cup of coffee and lovely breakfast before heading out.

Rob had a convention to go to, so I ran the shop for him Saturday. I left about 1:30, and Josh ran it for the rest of the afternoon. Depsite my lack of expertise in selling the merchandise, we had a pretty busy day. I felt stressed out, and I realized it's because I hate not knowing answers to people's questions. However, one of the items we sell is Yu-Gi-Oh cards, and some of the questions people ask me are way above my head. Personally, I think that any kid (or adult) who can understand the rules of the game must be of superior intellect. Really. It's more complicated than a brain like mine can fathom.

After I left the shop, I came to work and got some filing and other organizing done. It's stuff that's really hard to orchestrate while other people are around.

Rob and Jo and I hung out in the evening, had dinner together, while Josh and Jess went to the local fair. We picked them up at ten-ish, and headed home.

Sunday I slept in, worked the shop again for a portion of the day, and then did some socializing with other local shop owners. I enjoy walking around, chatting and catching up with some of my favorite people. I bought a few small items here and there, but nothing major.

We had a very busy day at the shop, so I helped out as needed throughout the day.

Rob and I got groceries after we closed the shop. From there we headed home. Josh had cleaned the living room while we were gone shopping, which was a huge help. Then all the kids brought the groceries in put them away, after which we had dinner. I spent the rest of the evening doing laundry and reading. I'm about halfway through the book I'm on, and I'm loving it. This is one I'll hate to finish, because I'm so enjoying the world the author has created.

So, that's the story of my weekend. Nothing overly exciting, but certainly a decent weekend.

Hope your week is off to a good start. Looking forward to hearing how your weekend went.

More later!

Thursday, August 3, 2006

Here's Scrappy!

Here's Scrappy!

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Here's Scrappy's scrapbooking tools: (Notice the album?)

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Here's one the the pictures in Scrappy's "album":

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Here's a close up of Scrappy's foot, with his flip flop on:

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Here's the kit I got with him:

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And finally, here is Scrappy in his house, ready to ride, camera in hand:

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I highly recommend that if you have the time and money, check this place out! It's so much fun!

Adventures of the Wayward Parents

This post ended up being a late in the day post. I don't know why, but it seems I've been busy all day. I think maybe it's that I didn't get in until nine, instead of when I'm supposed to at eight, and the rest of the day has been hectic. I turned off my alarm when it went off instead of hitting "snooze." I woke up fifteen minutes after I was supposed to be at work! That wasn't really the most productive start to the day. I just don't feel like I've accomplished all that much to have been so busy.

Last night Rob and I went to the mall....GASP....without the children. It was really nice. The first place I stopped was Payless. There's a movie/music store right across the hallway, so Rob went there while I looked at the sales on sandals. The sandals I had on were rubbing the back of my heels and grating on my last available nerve. So I got these sandals that look like something worn in ancient Greece. They're gold and backless. Alas, they aren't good walking shoes. No padding. So, these will be the "wear around the office or anywhere I don't have to do excessive walking" shoes.

I went to Victoria's Secret...another GASP....because they had sent me a coupon for a free pair of undies...up to a $7.50 value. The first thing I thought was, "$7.50...for a PAIR of underwear?!?!?!" They'd better sculpt, shape, tone, make me look ten years younger, ten pounds thinner and play MP3s if they're $7.50! Geez! I went in, fully intending to buy something else in the store. You know, maybe a nice spray perfume or maybe a cute summer sleep set. But I figured it all out. I KNOW what Victoria's Secret is. Only it's not a very well hidden secret.

The secret is that they only hire women who are 95 pounds or less, 21 or younger, that wear enough makeup to keep Clinique in business, who are above average in looks, whose hair is four shades lighter than bleach blonde and at least a foot and a half in length, are below average in intelligence, and have the attitude that they are God's gift to all mankind. Okay, I know that was harsh. It's just my generally feeling after having left the store. Maybe it's just this particular store. I haven't made any comparisons or taken any surveys to prove my theory. :)

You know, I don't want to go on and on about this one stop, because the night was more pleasant than unpleasant. However, a few things must be said:

#1. If you are over thirty and look like a mom...guess what? You are still a person who deserves respect. Remember, girls, you'll be my age someday, and all the damage you've done to your hair and skin and metabolism will have caught up to you by then. So there!
#2. Snotty, rude remarks made to me or even another customer are not likely to make me buy will make me LESS likely to buy something. If you work on commission...well, you do the math. Oh wait, you might not be able to add, since you're such a bubblehead!
#3. High pressure sales tactics also make me less likely to buy something just because it irritates the crap outta me. Figure that out!
#4. I also get irritated watching clerks pressure other customers to buy things they don't want. Treat people how you'd want to be treated and you'll go MUCH farther in life.

Finally, and this is just a general observation:

#5. I was shocked that an Amish woman was browsing the "thigh high hose" and "garter" section of the store. At that point, I lost most of my irritability and was just incredulous. Who knew? Under all those very conservative clothes could be ...DOUBLE GASP....Sensual lingerie! Wow.

Anyway, I basically stomped up to the register, slapped down my coupon and free very basic looking pair of panties and said, "This will be all for me today." in a very firm voice. Unlike the previous customers who were subjected to a barrage of interrogation, the product was rung up, placed in a bag, and that was that. I don't have any intention of going back in there....ever. Hrumph!

Okay, then we left that mall and went to one that had a Build-a-Bear Workshop. I kid you not, my experience there was the direct opposite of the one I had at Victoria's Secret. It was a blast! In fact, I had gone in with the assumption that the bear I wanted was going to be at least $75, and that I would probably just price it. Instead, I found that the bears start out at around $18. The outfit I wanted and accessories totaled only $20! It was amazing. The staff was cheery and helpful. There was no high pressure sales tactics. They helped me step by step make the bear I wanted. It was one of the best shopping experiences of my life!

I made "Scrappy," who is my scrapbook bear. I plan to take him with me to my crops from now on. They allow you to print out a "birth certificate" and the whole nine yards. Plus, since I purchased the scrapbook outfit, I got two free scrapbook sets to make a page. The kits included stickers, paper and letters. It was so cool!

Rob went in with me, which was real treat. He was excited to see how they had Browns and Bengals football outfits, stuff for just about every imaginable interest. I know Jess will want to make a cowboy bear. Jo loves monkeys, so he'll probably make a Browns' monkey. Jess works on the weekends, so she'll most likely make one in the next week or so. Jo's birthday is coming up soon, so his will be in celebration of his big day.

Anyway, after the Build-A-Bear fun, we went out to eat at a new restaurant that recently opened up near the mall. It was a roadhouse place, and it was nice to go out, just the two of us. I noticed that I only had a very small portion of food and was immediately full. I can tell my appetite has significantly decreased over the last few weeks of eating the way I have. So, I took my entire meal home.

The funniest part of the evening was when I got home. Jess spied the Victoria's Secret bag and said, "Awwww, mom, look at you! Victoria's Secret! Did you buy something sexy?" She snagged the bag and looked inside. She gave me the most disgusted look, and said, "Mom. Come on. You went all the way to Victoria's Secret for GRANNY panties?" She shook her head and walked away. Oh, that was a hoot! What was she expecting? I'm not sure I even want to know!

Anyway, though this is a late post today, I'm going to try to post some pictures of my bear creation before I leave. Cross your fingers!

Hope you have a super great weekend!

Grandmas and Grandkids

Just a few cute e-mail stories to start the day.

An elderly woman and her little grandson, whose face was sprinkled with bright freckles, spent the day at the zoo. Lots of children were waiting in line to get their cheeks painted by a local artist who was decorating them with tiger paws."You've got so many freckles, there's no place to paint!" a girl in the line said to the little fella.

Embarrassed, the little boy dropped his head.His grandmother knelt down next to him "I love your freckles. When I was a little girl I always wanted freckles, she said, while tracing her finger across the child's cheek. "Freckles are beautiful!"

The boy looked up, "Really?"
"Of course," said the grandmother. "Why, just name me one thing that's prettier than freckles."The little boy thought for a moment, peered intensely into his grandma's face, and softly whispered, "Wrinkles."


A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like. "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods."The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"


My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how are we alike?"

"You're both old," he said.


When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure."
"Look in your underwear, Grandma," he advised. "Mine says I'm four."


A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments.They were ready to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted,"Thou shall not take the covers off thy neighbor's wife."


Our five-year-old son Mark couldn't wait to tell his friend about the movie we had watched on television, "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea."
The scenes with the submarine and the giant octopus had kept him wide-eyed.In the middle of the telling, my husband interrupted Mark, "What caused the submarine to sink?" With a look of incredulity Mark replied, "Dad, it was the 20,000 leaks!!"


A second grader came home from school and said to her mother,"Mom, guess what? We learned how to make babies today."The mother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool."That's interesting," she said. "How do you make babies?"
"It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change "y" to "i" and add "es."(Why wouldn't an English teacher love that one?)


"Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher.The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant."
The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked.
"Sure," said the young boy confidently. "It means carrying a child."


A grandmother was surprised by her 7 year old grandson one morning.He had made her coffee. She drank what was the worst cup of coffee in her life. When she got to the bottom, there were three of those little green Army men in the cup. She said "Honey, what are these army men doing in my coffee?"
Her grandson said, "Grandma, it says on TV, "The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup!"


A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties."They use him to keep crowds back," said one youngster."No," said another, "he's just for good luck."
A third child brought the argument to a close..."They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."