Friday, April 27, 2007

What I'm Hearing Lately

"Where there is no vision, the people perish."
-Proverbs 29:18

This is the verse that I am hearing over and over in my heart lately.
I've been doing some serious reflecting this week.

Today my uncle (who doesn't know I have a blog) sent me an email forward. It is a story that resonates in my heart, because it is indeed exactly what I've been trying to grapple with in my life these days. I will elaborate more at the end of this post.

Here's the email:

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.

She said, "Hi, handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?"

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant squeeze.

"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.

She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of kids..."

"No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.

"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake. We became instant friends.

Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us.

She was introduced and stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.

Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said,
"I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know."

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began,
"We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.

There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success.

You have to laugh and find humor every day.

You've got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die
. We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it!

There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up. If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight. Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change.

Have no regrets. The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets."

She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose." She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.

At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago. One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.
These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.


We make a Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.

God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.

I was reading an issue of "Ladies Home Journal" the other day, and there was a story in it about listening, and how listening validates both the hearer and the speaker's souls.

It talked about a psychologist who had been in a catastrophic accident. He was paralyzed. He was contemplating suicide.

As he was lying in icu, his nurse came up and said, "Pardon me, but if you don't mind me asking, are you a psychologist?" He responded that indeed he was. The nurse said, "Do you mind if I ask you a question?" He encouraged her to go on.

Her question was, "Does everyone think about suicide from time to time?" He looked the nurse in the eye and said, "Do you care to talk about this?" She nodded, and pulled up a chair beside his bed.

She spoke, and he listened for two hours. The nurse left the room with hope, able to face her challenges.

The experience had an unexpected impact on the psychologist. He knew, having helped the nurse, that he could go on living. He could help others, and he was not helpless to contribute to the world.

These three things I mention: the verse from Proverbs, the email forward, and this article, all speak the same thing to me.

I was losing hope. I had convinced myself that I had nothing to look forward to. I felt that my health was robbing me of my ability to contribute, and I was feeling like a lost cause.

The thing of it is, I believe everything in life happens for a reason. I couldn't...and still don't see what possible purpose all these health issues serve. But like the serenity prayer indicates, I'm starting to see that there are some things I can't change, some things I can, and I need to be wise enough to know the difference. I can't change my allergies, but I can change my attitude.

Further, there are a few things I know about my life:

  • I'm not dead yet.
  • I can still type, walk, smile, laugh, hug my kids, enjoy my loved ones
  • I am tenacious enough not to give up when I feel like quitting
  • I have people who love and support me
  • I have to cultivate my dreams, or my soul will wither and I will die inside. Setting goals that are fun...that's one step in that direction.
  • I have many things I can do well....writing, listening, encouraging others...I have a's to use those gifts to their fullest.
  • I have a home...two, actually, and more possessions than I'll ever need-two cars, a full time job and clothes on my back.
  • I have the continuing ability to see the humor in life and I need to keep laughing...even if I have to actively seek out something that makes me laugh. Maybe it's a comedic movie...maybe it's a humorous book, or maybe it's watching my pets' antics. Whatever it is, I have to look for the humor in life. The health benefits are worth it.
  • My health has its ups and downs, but as long as I have breath in my body, I can contribute. I may not be able to contribute by mowing the lawn or by cleaning out a dusty barn...but I can wash a dish, do a load of laundry, or mop a floor.
  • Not to be forgotten, I have this blog. It's a place where I can dump my pain and find some relief for a little while. It's a place where I can connect with supportive friends and gain valuable insight from them.

I'm still not 100%....I've still fighting the shortness of breath and chest pain, but it gets better day by day.

I feel like myself again, and I feel like living, giving and growing.

I will be okay.

Thanks for being there this week as I regrouped.

Hugs! Have a good weekend; I love you all!

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

To Answer Holli's Question

When I first went to the allergist, they said, "Let's try allergy shots."

So, a friend of mine that used to work with me and I were going once a week. I had to have three shots a week. She had two. (I think.)

When I went in for testing, I was allergic to EVERYTHING I was tested for except down feathers. I was allergic to mold, trees, grass, pollen, pet dander, etc., etc., etc. Mold and dust mites were +5 (the highest possible reaction) and everything else was at least +3.

So, they started me off on the normal injection. They actually inject a person with small amounts of what they are allergic to. They do this in an attempt to gradually make your body grow accustomed to these normal environs.

My body went haywire. In fact, after the initial testing where they pricked my back with the allergens, I had to go to the hospital for a breathing treatment. I was fine when I first left their office, but later my back became awash with welts and I started having shortness of breath.

I never stopped reacting adversely to the shots. They said, "Wait 30 minutes after your shot and we will inspect the injection site." My arm never swelled up much right away. By the time my coworker and I got back to the office, my arm would swell up to the size of a softball welt. I would call in and tell them that. They would say, "Would you say it was the size of a dime, quarter, or half dollar, this welt." I'd say, no, like the circumference of a softball. They would say, "That is not possible." So, I'd have my coworker take a picture of my arms and then I'd email it to them. Or I'd go back in and show them. They would say, "OH MY GOD! Can you breathe?!" I'd say, "Well, I'm a little short of breath."

So, next time, they'd cut the dosage in half. Same thing would happen. Finally, they said, "We're sorry, you're not a candidate for allergy shots. We have cut you down to the lowest possible dose and you are still reacting."

I no longer go to an allergist at all. I was supposed to do an "asthma prevention map" or something like that. I was given a chart and a device to measure my lung capacity. I was supposed to take measurements on my breathing three times a day for a month. I was then to bring it back to the office and discuss a prevention plan...strategies for getting my breathing under control. I didn't do that, because I kept forgetting or got too busy. Finally, the office I was going to told me they would not see me again until I did this workup. They said I was not cooperating with doctor recommendations for my health, therefore until I did so, they could not help me.

Now, my co-pay for specialist visits has increased to $50 per visit, so going back to them is not something I am even entertaining at this point.

Right now I take a Benadryl every night, a non drowsy otc allergy med during the day, my depression med, Effexor, which I only take 75 mg. of once a day; I take Prilosec otc for acid reflux. Acid reflux and asthma somehow go hand and hand, although I'm not sure why. One makes the other worse and visa versa. If I go off of the Prilosec for one day, my stomach feels like it's on fire and the pain is intense.

Right now I'm still using samples of Nasacort that the nurse practitioner gave me, as well as Singulair. Singulair works to block luekatrines, which is one element in the body that causes allergies. Antihistamines (Benadryl, Claritin) block histamines, which cause the body to overreact to environs as well. Then, of course, I have my albuterol inhaler, which I keep with me at all times.

I'm still in debate about what I should do. I had an appointment with my primary care physician tonight that I made over a month ago. He's hard to get in to see. I planned to talk to him about my feelings right now about my health. However, I got a call today from his office, saying he had a family emergency and was cancelling all appointments. I haven't decided whether to reschedule or not at this point.

I'm feeling better each day, but I know I have some decisions to make. Thanks for letting me ramble.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Below the Lyrics

I started a post yesterday and it falls below the "lyrics" post. It is how I feel right now, as accurately as I can describe my thoughts.

Lyrics to a Insightful Song

I've long understood these lyrics, but even more so lately. See artist/song name at end of post.

I feel like I wanna smack somebody
Turn around and b--- slap somebody
But I ain't goin' out bro (no, no, no)
I ain't givin' into it (no, no, no)
Anxieties bash my mind in
Terrorizing my soul like Bin Laden
But I ain't fallin' down bro (no, no, no)
I won't lose control bro (no, no, no)
Shackle and chained
My soul feels stained
I can't explain got an ich on my brain
Lately my whole aim is to maintain
And regain control of my mainframe
My bloods boiling its beatin' out propane
My train of thoughts more like a runaway train
I'm in a fast car drivin' in a fast lane
In the rain and I'm might just hydroplaine

I don't fear none of my enemies
And I don't fear bullets from oozies
I've been dealing with something thats worse than these
That'll make you fall to your knees
and thats the the anxiety
the sane and the insane rivalry
Paranoias brought me to my knees
Lord please please please
Take away my anxiety
The sane and the insane rivalry
Paranoias brought me to my knees
Lord please please please
Take away my anxiety

My head keeps running away my brother
The only thing making me stay my brother
But I won't give into it bro (no, no, no)
Gotta get myself back now
God, I can't let my mind be
my enemy is my own
Gots to find my inner wealth
Gots to hold up my thoughts
I can't get caught (no, no, no)
I can't give into it now (no, no, no)
Emotions are trapped set on lock
Got my brain stuck goin through the motions

Only I know what's up
I'm filled up with pain
Tryin' to gain my sanity
Everywhere I turn its a dead end in front of me
With nowhere to go
gotta shake this anxiety
Got me feelin' strange
paranoia took over me
And its weighin' me down
And I can't run any longer,
yo Knees to the ground

I don't fear none of my enemies
And I don't fear bullets from oozies
I've been dealing with something thats worse than these
That'll make you fall to your knees
and thats the The anxiety
the sane and the insane rivalry
Paranoias brought me to my knees
Lord please please please
Take away my anxiety
The sane and the insane rivalry
Paranoias brought me to my knees
Lord please please please
Take away my anxiety

-Black Eyed Peas with Papa Roach....Anxiety

A Little Background

I want to, first of all, thank Denise for her insight about my anger last week. I hadn't even thought about the steroid shot playing a part in my anger issues. I feel a lot less angry today. But I am feeling quite discouraged as the week gets underway.

I want to say that I don't like to complain. I prefer to count my blessings and I don't like to draw attention to my own issues. I'm much more comfortable sitting and listening to other folks' problems than I am talking about my own. I always feel guilty for talking about my problems. I think, "There are so many people (even ones I know and love) that have life so much harder than me. What right do I have to complain?"

I guess there are just times I have to get some things off my chest. If I carry them around, the burden gets heavier and heavier and the weight crushes me.

Way back when, even as a child, I liked not making waves. I liked not being an inconvenience. I created my own little world and there I found peace.

My grandmother always said....

that she would be cooking or cleaning she would all of a sudden wonder where I was. She hadn't heard me make a peep in hours and she'd suddenly panic and run to look for me. She said I was always sitting somewhere, off on my own, playing quietly. She said I could sit for hours and play without needing to be entertained. I liked being alone, because I wasn't truly alone. I had my imagination. I had the world at my fingertips. I had my own world, where parents didn't walk away from their kids and life was quiet and safe. Where life was simple and happy and full of joy.

Another thing my grandmother always talked about....

.... and my birth mother agreed with (the fact that they agreed was a miracle in and of itself!) was about my health as an infant/child.

My birth mother left my dad, my brother and I when I was four months old. So she didn't have much time to get to know me, but what she did remember was this:

I was allergic to practically everything that I came in contact with. My hair would fall out from being allergic to my baby shampoo. I couldn't wear disposable diapers, and my cloth diapers had to be washed in non fragrant soap. It was difficult to find a baby formula that I could digest. I would break out in hives and rashes if anything new was introduced into my environment. I coughed and sneezed and was sick 90% of the time.

I personally remember.....

...having my first asthma attack. I was laying on a bean bag chair, watching tv, holding one of our cats, and I stopped breathing. I panicked, stood up, dropped the cat, and ran to my grandmother. By the time I got to her, I could breathe again. She scolded me for being "overly dramatic" about it.

Later that year, she took me to the allergist she went to. When the allergist told her to get rid of the cats, put them outside, but keep them away from me, she stopped taking me to the allergist altogether. The cats remained in the house.

I didn't have another asthma attack like that until the fall of 1998. I had just moved to a big, old rental (fully carpeted) house. I had just started working where I currently work. I was sitting outside, watching the kids play with our dog, and enjoying the fall splendor. Suddenly, I couldn't catch my breath. I went inside and took a Benadryl and was able to breathe normally within an hour or so. Later, I found out there was mold in the roof of the house we were renting at the time and it had no dust filtration system on the furnace.

Lately, the way I feel is.......

I joke that one day I will have to live in a bubble. It's funny most of the time, but it's not funny some days.

Sometimes I get sick of living like this.

I like to pretend that I can do anything I want to. I like to think I can clean or work outside or eat without wondering if I'm allergic to something in the food.... or play with my dogs or have my cats sit on my lap without paying a price for it.

I haven't been able to breathe right for the last week or so. Every breath hurts. I think it contributes to my depression because of depleted oxygen levels.

Or maybe it's just that I'm tired.

I want to live a normal life. I am angry that this is a chronic condition. I want to go home, dust and do laundry and hang up clothes without getting sick. I want to eat pizza or lasagna or chili or whatever and not have Robert have to cook something different for me. I don't want to have to wear a mask for everything I do or pop pills or puff an inhaler every five seconds to just get through the day. I want to live a normal life.

I want to mow the grass if I choose to.

I want to try a new shampoo without getting hives.

I want to buy a new lotion without getting a rash everywhere.

I want to buy a fragrant dryer sheet or a scented laundry softener.

I want to wear my wedding ring or a pair of my grandmother's earrings without having a reaction.

Or put a band aid on my cut without swelling up.

I am just sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I don't know if my life is going to ever be any different.

I'm turning 35 this year and I've been like this since I was born.

What purpose does this serve? What cosmic good is going to come of being born into a weak body? A body that overreacts to any and everything?

My spirit is willing, but my body is weak.

My illnesses continually knock me off my fitness goals.

My illnesses inconvenience my family.

Being on the eight different medications that the allergist wanted me on cost my family financially....dearly....but not being on them is no better. I keep having to go for chest X-rays and tests and pay out co-pays for doctor visits when I get down sick.

My body is causing my mind to deteriorate.

I want to be strong. I want my body to be what my mind thinks it should be. I just want to be be able to do what most people my age can do.

What I'm realizing lately is that I can't have both my health and a normal life.

I talked to Robert about this last night.

I cannot continue to do the things I have been and survive.

My lungs are in terrible shape. As of right now, only 1/2 of my left lung is functional from years of scarring from pneumonia.

I'm not and never have been a smoker. But my lungs are a mess.

I told him that I have such a strong desire to contribute equally around the house and yard.

If I don't I feel like a failure.

If I do I get sick.

His reply is that he'd rather do more and have the kids do more than to lose me one day. He feels like I need to stop pushing myself so hard. I need to stop trying to be superwoman.

Right now I'd just settle for being a fully functioning woman.

I am depressed, my friends.

I really don't want to post here. I want to go inward with my pain until I work it out.

I will typically talk myself out of these funks.

I will force my mind to comply with my optimistic view of life in general.

I've gone down this dark path before and came out okay. I've battled depression and anxiety time and time before.

I will post here, against my natural instinct to hide, because I wouldn't want my blogger friends to hide their pain from me. I would want to hear the pain and be able to be a friend.

"Eventually, I will be okay. I'll get through this pain." That's what the hopeful Kris says.

Right now, the tired Kris thinks.....

"Nothing is ever going to change. I will always be this way. I am an inconvenience."

Friday, April 20, 2007

Angry, Angry, Angry, Angry!

Oh my gosh, I am so angry today! I am plain, downright venomous.

I am going to have to to the Internet and do some research to see if it's the Tylenol with codeine.

It's taking away the pain and helping me sleep, but could it be that it is also making me mean?

I want to lash out at people around me for no reason.

It's gorgeous, sunny and 65 degrees out. It's Friday! I'm caught up on my work. I'm under no kind of pressure to do anything this weekend.

Yet I am in such a foul mood that I snapped at Bipsy and she went for a walk because I hurt her feelings. I promptly apologized, but I felt bad because I shouldn't have been so hateful.


I need a vacation, people! I really do.

One thing is that Robert and I are car sharing for awhile. Our van is having some problems that we just haven't been able to fix. We're trying hard to budget it in, so I'm praying nothing unexpected comes up (again.) The bad thing about the car sharing is that I can't go home early even if I want to. I'd have to turn right around and come back to town, anyway, to pick Robert back up.

Whine, whine, whine. Ellie, did you ever get that cheese with your whine? ;) If so, you need to share! ;) teehee!

Hope you all have a good weekend.

I'm feeling better, even as I write. Cross your fingers that I keep getting better and am able to make it home without sharpening up my machete.


Thursday, April 19, 2007

Can't Even Stand Myself

I am in such a foul mood. Ugh! I mean it! I don't even want to be around me! I feel so negative! Negativity is literally oozing from my pores! I want to go take a nap. I want to go home and vegetate. I want to be anywhere but here at work.

I am so full of angst and fatigue and anger and frustration and resentment. I hate when I feel like this. It's my own fault. I feel myself falling in to some patterns of behavior that are so unlike me. I'm not using my normal coping strategies. I'm gradually turning to some rather unhealthy ones.

I have some issues with some people in my life, but I don't want to say anything. For various reasons.

Holding all this in is getting to me.

I feel so far behind on all of my goals...for the house, for my finances, for my health.

I really think I need a vacation. Or a three day weekend at least. I've worked so many weeks with only weekends off- I think it's finally getting to me. 9-10 hour days, 5 days a week. I need some time to do something other than work.

But of course, on the weekends, I scramble around to try to play catch up for what I'm not getting done through the week.

I wish I were a bear...because people expect them to be grumpy, and it would be perfectly acceptable behavior for me to hibernate and ignore everything and everybody for a whole winter. :) Sounds like a plan to me!

Can I Call 'Em, or Can I Call 'Em?

Yep. Pleurisy. Big shock there. I feel better today, since the steroid shot must have kicked in by now. Such a relief! I'm blessed! Now if only I could get my doctor's office to start calling me with results as promised instead of me having to call them three times to get them. But that's another rant for another day....

How's your day going? How's the weather there? Any sign of spring returning?

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

All News that Is News

Nothing new here. The nurse practitioner assured me she would call me back last night, and still hasn't. Gotta love the waiting game. The pain in my chest has gotten worse, so last night I took a Tylonel 3 that I had left over from my surgery last year. I did sleep, but I am loopy today. Groggy.

This is gross, but today I'm starting to cough up green phlem (E-yuck!) but because of that I am a bit relieved. Perhaps this is just "walking pnuemonia." I'd much rather have that, since I've had lung issues all my life, rather than a heart attack or stroke, no matter how mild. I'd like to keep my heart muscle in tact, thank you very much. It seems like a rather important muscle, you know? ;) I've heard people can live on just a piece of lung, but the heart....the body kind of likes having blood pumped to it. So: lung stuff good, heart stuff bad. (Still don't have a definitive answer about the blood pressure thing.)

Josh is feeling better, but I kept him out of school, anyway. He's not 100% and now Jess is feeling yucky. Sigh. The yucks travel fast with kids. I hope Jo doesn't get sick, because he just got over strep throat a few weeks back.

Maggie is doing so much better today. She isn't running any marathons, but we had to watch her like a hawk yesterday. Anytime anyone opened the back door, she tried to sneak out. She wants to play with the other dogs, but it's too much for her right now. I allowed her some outdoor time on her leash, and I let her "sniff" the other dogs, but kept her from playing with them. They're just too rowdy, even our little Taz. I can tell Maggie is bored, but the whole time she's awake, her tail is thump-thump-thumping on the wood floor. She seems to be irritated with her incision, but isn't trying to bother it too much. She's eating and drinking normally now, so I think she's going to recover just fine.

That's it for now. I have some actual work to do.

Hope you're having a good day!


Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Mystery Illness

Josh and I went to the doctor last night. He has strep throat, and is on antibiotics. With my kids, if they say they have a sore throat and a headache, you can almost bet it is strep. He can't go to school today, he's contagious, so as a result his appointment with the psychologist has to be rescheduled. Bummer. There is a pretty long waiting list for appointments with that doctor. Oh well. What's meant to be is meant to be. Perhaps the timing was not right and the wait is what needs to happen for Josh to get the best diagnosis and treatment. I'm going to prefer to look at it that way.

I, on the other hand, have a mystery illness. I told the nurse practitioner how I felt, and what my symptoms were. I'm usually right on target with what is going on with me, because 9 times out of 10, I've had whatever I'm there for at least once before.

What red flagged the whole thing is that my blood pressure was high. I have been stressed beyond measure in the past and my blood pressure is never high.

I went to my doctor several years ago and said, "Put me on something to help me stop having all this anxiety. I'm watching my grandmother deteriorate before my eyes. I know she is in decline. I know I am going to have to prepare myself for her death. Please give me something to help me cope." My blood pressure was low even then. I felt like I was going to implode from all the stress, and my blood pressure was low.

In fact, last time I went to the doctor I had hives because of my stressful ride there. Some guy had flipped me off and tailgated me, then tried to run me off the road going around me. Was my blood pressure high? Nope. It was 120 over 65. That's usually as high as it gets. Yesterday it was 145 over 100. That was a red flag.

They started to say that perhaps because I was feeling poorly-that maybe that was the reason my blood pressure was up. I said, "Look at my chart. I've been in here with pneumonia, double ear infections, kidney infections, bladder infections, utis, and sinus infections sometimes in conjunction with one another-and never once was my blood pressure high." I said, "I just don't feel THAT bad. I don't feel stressed out."

So, they sent me for a chest X-ray, gave me a steroid shot, and said they'd call me today. They want to rule out a stroke, an embolism, a mild heart attack, pleurisy, of course, and pneumonia. Great. Good. Nothing like waiting on ruling out those type of issues. :)

The thing is, I think I feel worse today than before. The shortness of breath is worse. The pain when I lie down is worse. I don't think the steroid shot helped. We'll see. Maybe it takes longer to kick in. Who knows?

On a bright note, Maggie is at home resting comfortably. I felt so sorry for her last night. She kept falling asleep standing up. She wouldn't eat or drink. It's so much harder on a female dog/cat to be spayed than for a male dog/cat to be neutered. My male dogs were running and jumping and playing after their surgeries. Maggie didn't want to lie down at all last night.

This morning I knew she was feeling better. I heard Robert get up to go to the bathroom, and I could hear what sounded like someone knocking on the front door. I knew right away it was Maggie's tail thumping on the floor. She can leave red marks on my legs from her tail wagging so hard. She is that exuberant when she sees her family. I was so tickled by what the vet wrote at the bottom of Maggie's release/home care papers. It said, "Wow- Maggie is just about the sweetest dog ever!" It brought tears to my eyes. Maggie is the only female dog I've ever had, and she is one of the mildest mannered dogs I've ever owned. I am glad the vet shares my opinion on that, and that I'm not just biased because she's mine. :)

I meant to post this yesterday, but I'm going to blame it on lack of oxygen to my brain: :)

Happy Birthday, Ellie!!!!!

Monday, April 16, 2007

A Zillion Unorganized Thoughts

Trying my best to remember all of what's happening on this cool and windy but sunny, cloudless Monday:

  • Dropped Maggie off to be spayed this morning. If the surgery goes okay, I'll pick her up this evening.
  • Josh is sick. He's home from school today with a sore throat, fever, fatigue and general yuckiness.
  • I have pleurisy. When I lay down, it hurts and when I cough, breathe heavily, walk, talk for more than a sentence or two or laugh, it hurts. I've had it before. Fun.
  • Since Josh and I are both sick, we both have afternoon appointments with the nurse practitioner at our primary care physician's office.
  • Josh has his first appointment with the psychologist tomorrow, to decide if ADHD meds are the way to go with him.
  • Josh got his track pictures in. There is a huge difference in his looks, just from his basketball pictures, which were taken in November. He's so much more muscular, for one thing. He looks a lot older, too.
  • Josh got a job at McDonald's. He put in an application online last Thursday night. On Friday, the manager called three times for him. (He was at a track meet.) Josh interviewed on Saturday, and was to do his orientation yesterday. However, the person that conducts orientation called in sick yesterday, so he should be having orientation on Wednesday.
  • Josiah brought every one of his grades on his report card up this semester. I am so proud of him!
  • Jess brought her math grade up, which is a subject she's always struggled with. Like mama, like daughter! Big time!
  • It was another good weekend...six in a row, despite being sick. I didn't feel good, but I wasn't down and out. I did some detail cleaning in the kitchen on Sunday. I feel better when I'm either standing up (still) or sitting up. So I do okay as long as I'm not trying to lift too much or move too fast.
  • I've had little sleep, but am not terribly fatigued today. Saturday night I was up until like 3 am. The power was out for hours overnight....don't know why. Must have been an accident somewhere that knocked the power out. The weather wasn't bad, but no one in our little village had power. So, I was up, unable to rest, with nothing to do. Finally, since Robert can't sleep without a t.v. or radio on, we went to town for batteries. We then watched our little battery operated t.v. until we finally fell asleep.
  • Yesterday we watched "Because of Winn-Dixie" on dvd. It was so good! It was one of the best movies geared toward kids I've ever seen! Jess and Jo have both read the book, so they were excited to see the movie. I swear, the little piglet and bunnies in the movie were so stinkin' cute!
  • Did throw Frisbee with Jo for about ten minutes yesterday, then came in after I got winded. He got this little archery set with arrows that have suction cups on it. He gets an allowance each week, and that's one of the items he bought this time around. I sat in a chair and we shot arrows at the target for awhile. That required less effort, so I wasn't as out of breath, and it was still fun. Although he beat my feeble attempts every time.
  • Today I did something I've never done in 18+ years of filing taxes. I filed for an extension. I needed some time to get some information in. I am so relieved that I have some extra time. I have too much going on right now to add taxes to my already overflowing plate!

I think that's it. Maybe. Possibly. Might be enough for one person, come to think about it. How was your weekend?

Friday, April 13, 2007

Eating for Health and Finance

On Robert's last few trips to the grocery store, he's picked me up some "South Beach Diet" lunches and breakfasts. I've eaten Lite Budget Gourmet meals and Smart Ones meals in the past. However, I'm finding that these South Beach meals seem to have a lot more flavor, and much bigger portions of veggies. Their average cost seems to range between $2-$2.50 per meal. Some of the breakfast and lunch wraps are packaged so that I get two servings for the $2-$2.50.

I think that it would be hard to eat healthily and still buy lunch out for that price at a fast food place. I keep some 100 calorie snack packs around, have diet teas, flavored waters, plain old bottled water, cottage cheese and yogurt as well as some low sugar treats around. I think it probably costs about $4-$5 a day (breakfast and lunch only) to eat the way I want to for my health.

It also takes the decision making out of "what to do for lunch?"

I've been slowing down on my workouts, but I have been pushing to get back in to an established routine. Pounds are not falling off of me, but they are very gradually.... a half a pound here, a pound there...disappearing. I think I'm at the point now where my eating has become pretty routine. I believe that's half the battle. I am most assuredly keeping my caloric intake at my goal level.

What's even better, is that I'm not feeling the urge to eat as often when under stress. I've added a commitment to my plan, which is: for every cup of coffee I drink, I commit to drinking the same quantity of water. Usually I don't exceed 2 cups of coffee a day, and half of the time I end up letting it sit and go cold. I end up dumping out as much coffee as I actually drink. Ellie, perhaps I need one of your fancy drink warming/cooling desktop devices that Chris got you! ;)

Anyway, I'm not where I want to be, but I'm not regressing, and I'm keeping my goals foremost in my mind. Now if this weather would only act like spring again, I could be invigorated with energy enough to get with my workouts on a more passionate level. Something about this cold, gray weather that is disheartening. Ugh.

That's it for now.

Are you having a good Friday? Any exciting plans for the weekend?

If I don't get to post again today, have an awesome weekend!


Thursday, April 12, 2007


In the past, I've had dreams that have been prophetic in nature. My dreams aren't always prophetic. There are some times that they are. I do think these dreams I'm having ARE prophetic. I'm not sure why I think this, but when my dreams are a foretelling, I sense that they are after I wake up.

I am fascinated by Holli's dream book. I think it has a lot greater information than the crappy one I had did. The dream interpretations in mine all sounded alike. I discounted its credibility alltogether. Holli's book seems to be much more logical and therefore, more likely.

I will give you two examples when my dreams were prophetic.

My friend had a daughter who was told she would never have children. I had known my friend, at the time, for a couple of years.

When she was telling me about her daughter's attempts to have children, in my spirit, I knew she WOULD have children.

About a week after the friend revealed this information to me, I had a dream. In the dream, I was in a house that I was not familiar with. I saw a baby who looked just like my friend. It was like a miniature version of my friend. I went over and picked the baby up, and I knew, because the baby was a mini version of my friend, that this was her granddaughter.

I felt led to tell my friend about the dream.

She immediately said, "Well, I think it was just a dream. My daughter has been trying for about eight to ten years now. We just don't think it's going to happen."

I said, "Okay, but I am just telling you what I saw. A dark haired baby girl that looked just like you."

About six weeks later, my friend received the news that her daughter was pregnant. She cried tears of joy. I smiled and sat back and waited.

Well into the pregnancy, my friend's daughter found out she was expecting a boy.

So my friend asked me, "What about that? Your dream spoke of a girl." I think my friend was slightly dissapointed, because she had her sights set on a granddaughter by this time. My reply came immediately, and I can't say that it came from my own heart. I said, "Who says the dream foretold THIS pregnancy?" My friend said, "Oh, no. They've already talked. They aren't having any more children. They only want one." "Okay," I said. I said nothing more.

Less than two years later, along came their dark haired girl. She now has blond hair, but she does look a great deal like my friend.

The other situation involved another friend and the sex of her baby, as well as the well being of her child. My friend had been having nightmares that her unborn child was going to be born severely deformed. The reason for her fear was that she was on a couple of medications that she had to take, which she knew could cause problems in her pregnancy. She was categorized as high risk.

I dreamt that she had a perfectly healthy baby girl, who was adorable. I told her that. She calmed down, and enjoyed the rest of her pregnancy, based on past situations where I had been given messages that turned out to be true. She did indeed have a beautiful baby girl who is now a healthy 8-year old.

So, I don't know, but I think these dreams are prophetic...and I think the change is going to directly impact my life.

So we'll see.

Picture Sharing Time

Here's some pictures I like that I've been trying to find time to share:

This first series come from a school project Jo recently did about poetry. He's in third grade, and he is in that cute time when kids spell things exactly like they sound. I think it makes his work all the more precious. :) The first one is my favorite.

Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share Photos

The second one demonstrates that he clearly shares his mom's love of eating. ;)

Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share Photos

The third one, his question...about a hot air balloon.... poem. I really think this one is cute.

Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share Photos

These are three easter pictures....two of Jess and Jo coloring eggs and one of three of the finished eggs.

Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share Photos

Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share Photos

Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share Photos

some pictures of Jo being a boy and doing handstands in the side yard at work...when I took a break to let him enjoy the weather. This was the day last week that the kids were on spring break and Jo spent the day with me at work.

Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share Photos

Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share Photos

That's it for now! Have a good day.

Two Nights Running

For two nights in a row, I've dreamt of babies. The night before last, it was a blond haired, fair skinned baby boy that I knew was biracial. The baby was not my child. It was a distant relative, but I don't know who it belonged to. I kept watching him, because no one else would take care of him. He was crawling around, just kind of on his own. No one seemed to care. He was chubby and cute, and I was trying to keep my eye on him without getting too attached.

Last night, I dreamt I had a baby boy. He was mine. I was totally enthralled with him. He was cute, sweet, and smart. I kept remarking that he was the fastest learner I had ever seen. I nursed him, I held him, my heart overflowed with love for him. Based on everything in the dream, this was my biological child.

At one point I was on the phone making a reservation for us to have another family portrait done. I remarked proudly that, "Yes, that's right. Family of six." I turned to Robert in the dream and said, "It's going to be hard to get used to saying that. I'm so used to saying we have a family of five." I remember that the baby had beautiful tan skin and reddish brown hair. Even Josh was pitching in to hold him.

For the record, I cannot have any more birth children. That ship has sailed. So I am not sure where all this baby stuff is coming from. I don't have the urge to have another baby, even if I could. I look at women my age who are getting pregnant for the first time and think, "Better them than me." I love holding babies and then giving them back. I'll be thirty-five in July, and I'm glad my child bearing years are behind me.

I realize the struggles I put myself through having children at such a young age were tough. However, at this point in my life, I'm glad I didn't wait. I think, often, about being a young woman...still in my forties, having all adult children. I'm not presuming that they'll all be out on their own, but I realize that I will still be able to enjoy life-travel-do things for me....Robert and I can make plans as a couple instead of as a family from time to time. So, needless to say, I'm looking forward to those days. Empty nest syndrome? Bring it on.

So, I don't know what these dreams are trying to tell me. It's the weirdest thing. I think I'll start writing them down.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Our Lady Peace, "Life"

This song was the fourth song on the cd Ellie sent me. I loved it the first time I heard it. I went to youtube to find the video, and I found this one, set to scenes from the video and to scenes from "Little Miss Sunshine." Ellie recommended that movie on her blog, so I thought to post that version here would be fitting. I love the words AND sound of this song.

My CrossWalk "Encouragement for the Day" Email

I get these emails every day from I wanted to share today's with you, because I find it applicable in my own life, and on this blog. To all my blogger friends, thank you for being such a rich part of my life. I love each of you!

April 10, 2007
The Perfume of Friendship - Part 1
Susanne Scheppmann

“The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense.”
Proverbs 27:9 (NLT)


Friends. They come in all shapes and sizes. Some have big hearts. A few deliver the sunshine of laughter. One may offer a slender shoulder for you to cry on. One ally might listen while you whine, while another may speak the truth even when it hurts. One girlfriend may bring a casserole when you are sick, still another offers a prayer for healing. Pals will compliment you, hug you, watch your kids, and send you a birthday card. Or they might call once a year just to catch up on life. Whatever type of friends filter through your life, true healthy friendships are a gift from God.

We learn the importance of friendship at a very early age. I remember my friend’s three- year-old daughter throwing out the worst insult she could conceive. Her little freckled face in a scowl, she would growl, “You no my friend!”

Throughout our lives, we long for friendship. This fact is supported by the television shows viewers loyally tune into throughout the decades. We hum lyrics from the Cheers theme song “Sometimes you want to go, where everybody knows your name, and they’re always glad you came.” We watch Friends with hopes we too might develop friends through the ups and downs of life.

Today’s verse, “The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense,” reminds us of the importance of friendship in our lives, Friendships enrich our lives. They help us through the valleys of despair and rejoice with us on the mountaintops of joy. Friends do life with us. Which of your friends has been with you through thick and thin?

Friends help hold us accountable in what we do. My friend, Sally, holds me accountable to exercise with her. If it weren’t for her, I would stay in my pajamas, instead of putting on my walking shoes. Scriptures tells us, “You use steel to sharpen steel, and one friend sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17 MSG). Sally keeps me dedicated to our agreement to improve our health and fitness. Another friend encourages me in my walk with God. I admire her dedication to God. Her passion sharpens my desire for a closer walk with the Lord Do you have a friend that inspires you in some way?

Of course, in order to have good friends, you must be a good friend to others. Certain qualities promote deep and lasting friendships. For example, honesty and loyalty set the foundation for friendship that can last a lifetime. My best friends are people I can trust and I want them to know they can trust me too. In addition, patience, kindness and a sense of humor are essential in developing and maintaining enduring friendship. Recently, I forgot a lunch date with a girlfriend. Hours later I was horrified when I remembered. I called only to discover she had completely forgotten it too. Relieved, we laughed together at our forgetfulness. A good chuckle at our human foibles helps us to keep in mind that even the best friendships will have imperfections. Do you show kindness, patience, humor and grace in your friendships?

Friendship! It’s one of the true riches we can have in this life. Will you thank God today for your personal friends?

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Shout out to my Blogger Peeps Neicy and Ellie

Just want to say, "thank you, thank you, thank you" to my blogger peeps, Neicy and Ellie. They have both brightened my days recently...last week it was Neicy with a huge box of books. I've been getting some great laughs out of the cartoons! Today it was Ellie with a cool cd of 15 songs, and two sweet cards! She not only sent the package once, but twice because even though she had my address perfectly correct, the US Postal service determined that I do not exist. I suspected as much all along.... ;)

You know, I love to give...I so enjoy it. But I do have to admit it feels pretty darn good to receive sometimes, too. ;) So thank you, again, ladies for making me smile. I needed that.

Monday, April 9, 2007

How's Life?

Everyone is so quiet out there in bloggerville. Actually working, I suspect.... I thought I'd take a moment to pause and update my blog today.

Sigh. I'm a little melancholy today. Just feel like I'm in limbo. I think it's the weather. So cruel. Hype us up with 60s and 70s then crash us down with intermittant snow and grey skies and cold temperatures. Just when I was all in the swing of Spring Fever!

I did have a good weekend. Not fabulous, but good. Five in a row? Yes indeedy. I may have to contact the people at Guiness for a personal record.

We started out Friday night on a bad note, but it improved.

We had a rip roaring good old fashioned family argument, which quickly turned from Robert and Jess bickering to Robert and I full out yelling. It was unusual but it happens sometimes. Even in the best of families, I'm thinking. I was angry, I cried, said some hateful stuff then huffed off in silence for awhile. Within an hour or so we made up. We took the kids to a skating (roller) rink about a half an hour away, then went out to eat at an El Dorado's that we've never been to before. I will confess that I drank both a 27 oz and a 16 oz strawberry marguerita. I don't really react much to alcohol, so I wasn't staggering around, but I did chill out a little bit. Literally.

Saturday was good. Went to Holli's for her CTMH get together. Took Jess and my friend, Sheila, showed up after much badgering all week. Plus I called and woke her up Saturday at 1ish. She always says, "Don't worry about waking me up. If I've worked the night before (she works third shift, 12 hr. shifts) I will keep my phone off while I am sleeping and let my voice mail pick up." NOT! Now I know why I never call her during the day. But we had a good time figuring out our orders. We tried not to order duplicate stuff, because we plan on sharing. We'll see how that works. Holli did an awesome job with her presentation. She seemed very confident. I was impressed.

Sunday, I got up bright and early in the a.m. and made a Wal-mart run. I picked up everything I could possibly think of that my family would need that we were out of so that we could get our sorry butts to church on Easter Sunday. I bought Josh and Robert shave cream and razors...we were out. I bought Robert a couple of churchy shirts, some slacks and a new belt. I bought the boys dress socks. I bought Jo and Josh some new slacks. I bought Jess a pair of leggings to go under her skirt. (It's so fashionable these days, but plus it was cold.) I even bought myself a sweater. I bought some pre-church snacks so we wouldn't need to cook breakfast prior to getting ready. I filled up the gas tank. I wanted all of our ducks to be in a row. Miraculously, we made it to church on time.

It was a good service. We really enjoy this has 400+ attendees each week. Robert likes that so he can blend in, unnoticed. I like it because there are numerous small groups I can get involved in if I want to, and it has a diverse children's ministry. It is also a bit more racially balanced than a lot of churches in the area. I do know some people from scrapbooking, from when we went there before, or from the kids' schools over the years. Several folks stopped me to chat. The worship is upbeat, the atmosphere comfortable. We are glad we went. We plan to make it a habit.

I did all of the cooking Sunday, which is unheard of at our house. :) Okay, sometimes on Sundays I do the cooking. Not regularly. Sometimes. I think Robert enjoys a break from the chore on occasion.

I made ham and cheese melts for lunch and chicken alfredo for supper. We had strawberry shortcake for dessert, and Robert made a salad to go with dinner.

Jo, Jess and I colored eggs. Really, I just boiled the eggs, got the supplies out and let them do the rest. Jess started laughing when she was measuring the vinegar and spilled it on Jo. It was a hoot.

All three kids hunted for eggs. Yes, even Josh. It was fun to watch. Jo got the most. He predicted that he will get as many eggs as he is old...says he does it every year....and sure enough, he got 9! Cool! He may have inherited some of my "sight," which I have not and probably will not talk about here. :) I have to have some secrets, right? ;) Anyway, we had colored two dozen eggs, and he got nine, so he came out the winner. It was fun.

So that was my weekend. How was yours?

Thursday, April 5, 2007

Getting Closer to Week End

Hey! How's life treating you in your neck of the woods? Good, I hope.

I wanted to mention, regarding the movie "Pursuit of Happyness," it is out on dvd. That's how we saw it. Robert bought it as soon as it came out. Jess had seen it with Jon when it was at the theatre, but it is out on dvd now. Just wanted to clarify that.

It's cold and keeps spitting snow here, but other than that, life is fine at this point. It's quite a shock to go from the upper 60s to back in to the 30s, but I know this, too, shall pass.

Yesterday Robert and I went to check out a discount department store that opened up in a neighboring town. It looks like a good place to buy school clothes for the kids, but otherwise nothing really caught my eye. We then went to a place called "City Barbeque" for dinner. We'd been there before, and enjoyed it. We didn't take the kids, just brought some food home. It is so nice to get out without them occasionally.

Tonight I have a crop to go to. I forgot to bring my stuff with me for the crop, so I'm not sure if I'm going to drive home and then back in town, or just hang out at the crop and chat. I guess it will depend on how I feel at the end of the day.

Nothing ultra exciting is happening, and that's just how I like things in my life. It's quiet times like this that I can collect my thoughts and revel in the stability that can be fleeting at times.

A lot of people are off tomorrow. Are you? I'm not one of them. They decided to give us the day after Thanksgiving off, paid, a few years ago and take away our paid Good Friday off. I think they gave us two paid holidays and took away one. Robert is off, so he's taking Josh to his second meeting with his counselor, which is good.

I'm kind of happy that, although I don't get a pay raise, I will once again be doing a personnel newsletter. This time, it will be for our sister company in Tennessee. I will borrow a lot of my old ideas from the newsletters I did years back for our company here in Ohio. I enjoy the writing and the research. It gives me some versatility in my duties. Although I do have a wide variety of responsibilities already, I find it rewarding that my career does utilize my love of writing in some way.

My boss has decided that Bipsy and I will take approx. 4 trips to Tennssee. We will go down on a Sunday, set up and conduct the training on a Monday. They will bring in a temp to answer phones while we are both gone. Should be interesting. We will come home on a Monday night. I am still looking forward to these trips. Especially now that it's turned so cold.

Last night I had the sweetest moment with Jess. Robert decided to sleep on the couch because his back had been hurting, so Jess decided to sleep with me. I said, "I bet I can still sing you to sleep." She laughed, and we started singing all the songs I would sing to she and Josh as babies to get them to relax. It wasn't ten minutes, and she was out like a light. I guess I still have the mommy's touch. :)

Okay, gotta run for now. More later.

Tuesday, April 3, 2007

Oh Yeah...and One Other Thing....

I simply forgot to mention something that I think was an important part of my weekend.

I don't recommend movies a lot here. I think a movie I might love may be just so-so to someone else. Although I do appreciate movie recommendations myself, so I think maybe I'll start giving my person "two thumbs up or thumbs down" here.

Sunday afternoon, I finally saw "Pursuit of Happyness." First of all, I have to say that sometimes I purposely avoid movies like this. Why? Because they are hard to watch. I love "fluff" movies. Movies where you laugh, don't have to think much, and walk away feeling better. After all, I have a lot of ups and downs in my own life, and when I watch a movie, I usually want to be entertained without having to think.

This was not one of those movies. It was a difficult movie to watch.

For that reason, it changed my life just a little bit.

I was sad. I was a bit depressed. I was inspired. I was humbled.

Robert watched it, and he felt the same.

So I'm going on record ;) to say: Watch it. If you don't feel inspired by it, then you've only wasted a few hours. If you do feel inspired, it could change your life...perhaps by making one day better or by changing your outlook on things on a permanent level.

That's it for now.

Monday, April 2, 2007

Beautiful Day

It's a beautiful's Monday, but I'm having a pretty good day in spite of that. :) It's 68 balmy, sunny degrees with scarcely a cloud in the sky. Gotta love it!

I am having pangs of loneliness for my blogger peeps, who all seem to be too busy today to post so far. I'm hoping they all get caught up enough to update me sometimes soon, because I'm going through blogger peep withdrawl. Although, it is busy here being the beginning of the month, so I'm coping. Snif. :)

Yep, hard to believe, but it was ANOTHER good weekend. :) Is that four in a row? Thank the Lord! I am so thrilled.

Friday night Robert took the boys (yes, even Josh!) to see the new Ninja Turtles movie. They all raved about it. Meanwhile, Jess and I went to pick out my new glasses, then went out to eat (at El Dorado's) and then went shopping. We got home pretty early, and all enjoyed our evening outing.

I wear glasses a little more often than I used to. My old glasses are too strong, because my eyesight improved quite a bit on my last two eye exams, the most recent being last May. For years my eyesight was going downhill, and they finally told me it was because I was wearing my contacts too much. It was depriving my eyes of oxygen, and the capillaries were starting to grow up toward my cornea. It was made worse by my use of antihistamines, which dried out my eyes. If the oxygen deprivation trend would have continued, I would have eventually gone blind. Enough said! I decided: what good would vanity be to me if I couldn't even see!? So, I started wearing my glasses a lot more often and my vision improved almost immediately.

With my improved prescription, the doctor advised me that if I didn't get new lenses, I might start getting headaches. Money had been too tight to order new glasses, but I finally budgeted it in, and Jess and I went together to pick them out. Jess tells me that my last pair of glasses made me look angry. They are black frames, and I have to admit they don't flatter my face at all. People constantly ask me if I am in a bad mood when I wear them. So, this time I took my very honest daughter with me to make the selection. We both love my choice! They are brownish square frames, small, and they have flecks of gold and red in them. It's almost as if they were meant for me! I am so excited about getting them that I may not even wear my contacts for awhile after I pick them up. That was fun, though, taking her with me.

So, a good time was had by all.

Saturday I did quite a bit of running around. I had to take Robert to work because he and I are car sharing these days until we get the van in for some brake work, so I was up and out early. Josh had a track meet. I had to take him to catch the bus at his high school, then headed back to town. I decided to stop by my Aunt Marlene's for a visit. We had a lovely 2 hour visit, and I was so glad I stopped by. We go for months and months without spending any time together, and then we pick right back up where we left off. She is such a sweetheart! Just seeing her made my weekend! After that visit, I ran a few errands then picked Robert up from work.

Later, I took Jess to a fundraiser at the high school, which Josh later went to after his meet. One of their classmates lost an arm as a result of a car accident last year. The fundraiser was to help raise money for his bills and for a new arm.

After I did that running, I went to a baby shower for my friend who recently had twins. I enjoyed the shower immensely. I had already made her small baby albums for her boys and for her four year old daughter. However, I decided to take a big collage frame and fill it with pictures of her family, including pictures of the twins. She teared up when she opened it, which was touching.

Sunday I worked in the yard again, most of the day. I still have a long way to go to accomplish all I need to. We've cut down so many dead limbs, small trees and we still have so much yet to do. I spent most of the day making a fire pit (which looks great, I must admit) and burned a lot of the smaller limbs. I did get a little too much sun, but not terribly so. I thought of Holli when I was out, and realized that I, too, should be keeping SPF lotion around the house. Jess and I are the only two in the house that ever REALLY burn, but I know I need to be more proactive about our skin care.

All in all, it was a great weekend. Today Jo is with me at work, as spring break is upon us. Jess is staying at a friends' house, and I am not confident that leaving Jo alone with Josh is a good idea. Usually Jess and Jo will spend the day with John's family if they are out of school. However, John is spending the week with a friend of his, so I had to go with plan B. Josh sleeps till noon when he's out of school, not to mention his temper is still untamed, so I will have Jo with me and Jess at a friend's most of the week.

Jo and I took a half hour around noon and went outside to enjoy the weather. Robert brought us lunch on his break, and the rest of the time Jo is playing with his toys and watching t.v. in the conference room. I'll admit that I do love having him around. ;)

So, that's all news that it news. What's going on in your world? How was your weekend? Hope to hear soon!

Until then, here's hugs and hope for a great week for you!