Where Are You Christmas?

Where are you Christmas?
Why can't I find you?
Why have you gone away?
Where is the laughter
you used to bring me?
Why can't I hear
music play?

My world is changing
I'm rearranging
Does that mean Christmas
changes too?

Where are you Christmas?
Do you remember
the one you used to know?
I'm not the same one
see what the time's done
Is that why you have
let me go?

I would type the rest of this song....about Christmas being here if you care and so on....but I'm just not feeling it right now. Faith Hill sings the song beautifully. But I'm not past the "Where Are You" part. The joy of Christmas alludes me yet again. Anyone else there in their life right now?

One too many stresses....losing a portion of my benefits here at work right before the holidays....(about $400 a month)....ongoing drama with life in general. Sigh.

I love Thanksgiving. Spending time together, cooking, laughing, eating, watching the parade. No huge expectations and potential dissapointments.

But Christmas...it's becoming a holiday that no matter how hard I try to celebrate it, I find myself dreading it more every year.

Teenagers have expensive wants. Budgets are tight all year, and then add Christmas to it, and things become next to impossible.

I love giving. I love wrapping gifts. I enjoyed making cards this year.

I just don't enjoy the worry that comes along with the whole thing.

Sometimes I wish I was Amish.

Then I wouldn't be shopping for MP3 players and video games right now.

Hope you're feeling the warmth of the holiday season. Send a little of that joy my way, okay? I could use some right now. ;)